Winter...

...is a cold season to be alone.

So, two people: Pinchas Zukerman and Leonidas Kavakos. I saw them both this past week--Zukerman at Carnegie (awesome place) and Kavakos at MSM.

First, Carnegie. I love it. It's such an old place and yet has such a homey feel, kinda like you're in someone's house. The concert hall is more relaxed as well--not as quiet and uptight as Lincoln Center.

Zukerman and his friend Bronfman played violin sonatas--all of them beautiful (Mozart, Beethoven, and Brahms! AMAZING!). I thoroughly enjoyed the performance. Zukerman really has this way with simple beauty. His timing is perfect too.

Kavakos--I saw him today, and I was sitting a few feet away from him. He was giving a masterclass, and I noticed that he really had a good idea of musical structure. Just awesome--he just GETS music. And his strad is awesome too.

Lately I've been wondering if I've been doing everything right--whether things are the way they should be, whether the things I'm doing are the things I should be doing...so many uncertainties. It's nice to have great friends around and an entire city to explore.

A good song I heard

Oh ! je voudrais tant que tu te souviennes
Des jours heureux où nous étions amis.
En ce temps-là la vie était plus belle,
Et le soleil plus brûlant qu'aujourd'hui.
Les feuilles mortes se ramassent à la pelle.
Tu vois, je n'ai pas oublié...
Les feuilles mortes se ramassent à la pelle,
Les souvenirs et les regrets aussi
Et le vent du nord les emporte
Dans la nuit froide de l'oubli.
Tu vois, je n'ai pas oublié
La chanson que tu me chantais.

[Refrain:]
C'est une chanson qui nous ressemble.
Toi, tu m'aimais et je t'aimais
Et nous vivions tous deux ensemble,
Toi qui m'aimais, moi qui t'aimais.
Mais la vie sépare ceux qui s'aiment,
Tout doucement, sans faire de bruit
Et la mer efface sur le sable
Les pas des amants désunis.

Les feuilles mortes se ramassent à la pelle,
Les souvenirs et les regrets aussi
Mais mon amour silencieux et fidèle
Sourit toujours et remercie la vie.
Je t'aimais tant, tu étais si jolie.
Comment veux-tu que je t'oublie ?
En ce temps-là, la vie était plus belle
Et le soleil plus brûlant qu'aujourd'hui.
Tu étais ma plus douce amie
Mais je n'ai que faire des regrets
Et la chanson que tu chantais,
Toujours, toujours je l'entendrai !

Writing Letters....

...is really mentally draining. It's quite odd.

Well, here at Columbia, everything's quiet. Obviously, of course, because it's fall break. A good time to reflect on my life a little.

I've been having a blast. I have great, loyal friends, and I can't help but feeling so blessed that I have people around me who I can trust. Late night runs to Hamilton Deli (called Ham Deli) and around the clock jam sessions has really made freedom worth living for.

Still trying to find myself of course. I've noticed I've been a lot more self-conscious lately, but it's something I'll live with.

Now, the question is, do I do HW or go find friends?

Well, only God knows the answer.

Meeting with the Chief

Well, I met the Chief of the UN Secretariat of The UN Permanent Forum on Indigenous Issues today. And, in our maybe 10 minute talk, she told me something that I'll take to heart.

As she says, the center of political science/human rights is the people, something easy to forget in the midst of politics.

It's so easy, I suppose, to forget this. It makes me wonder about myself as well--who am I, what am I doing, and why am I doing it?

Lot's of questions. I'll be thinking about the indigenous people more now.

A Bad day, but a good ending?

I am sitting in JJ's Place, the grease-centered monster of Columbia University. Basically, a late night eatery with a penchant for unhealthy foods. The chicken sandwich I'm eating is pretty good...I feel like I'll regret this later though.

Anyway, what started as a bad day ended as a relatively good one. I think I may be a bit too self-conscious--I need to remember my center on God rather than on people's opinions. Asians can be both difficult and great people--more on this later...

I guess I'm also worried about my future. But who isn't? The freshman transition can be stressful just because of the uncertainties of the initial breakthrough.

It has ended nicely however. I'm with my friends eating burgers. And writing on a blog. At the same time.

Haha...life can be good.

I'll keep this post short for now because I have to do homework. But, an ambivalent day filled with a cloud of priorities.

New Things

Last night, or I suppose this morning too, was a whole compilation of new experiences.

I went to the Rosary Vigil here hosted through the Columbia Catholic Ministry, and I met so many awesome people. They're really a close-knit community, and I'm blessed to have a church community around like that.

Aside from this, I sang in a church choir for the first time (I sang bass! wow...it was a divine experience), did a reading for the first time, prayed (with the others) all 20 decades of the rosary, helped celebrate a midnight Mass, and spoke French in both reciting the rosary and with others outside of a classroom context. God really does work in mysterious ways.

I guess it just got me thinking about myself, my life, where my center is, how I've changed so far at Columbia, and where my life is taking me.

I think it's been all part of the broader picture: who am I, who do I want to be, and what am I doing to get there? Where do I fit into the world?

"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many."--Mark 10:45

Prayer is a powerful tool, as they say. But it requires sacrifice.

Ups and Downs

If I've learned anything thus far, it's that college REALLY has a lot of ups and downs. This whole transition period's really becoming something I didn't expect.

I guess it's just a matter of establishing yourself in a new place--your whole identity is remade to whatever you make yourself to be, and that can be a bit scary after having been known as one person for your entire life.

Ups and downs--classes can be great but can also be severe downers. What I'm learning--it can be really amazing. But grades, for example--professors are really just not afraid to give you a grade they think you deserve, good or bad. Of course, you can dispute it, but sometimes, you really do deserve it, in the light of their comments on your essay. The subjectivity of essays can throw you in a curve as well....

Friends and meeting new people--ups and downs here too, but my friends have been absolutely wonderful. I couldn't ask for better ones. My floor is also amazing--so supportive and cool with whatever you do. I guess the problem I run into is with cliques--these can be pretty difficult to deal with here. But, all a part of growing up of course.

Bathrooms--let's leave this topic for maybe another post. Just, college can be fun until you realize that people do get overly drunk.

I'd say that it terms of academics, Columbia is top notch. In terms of people, even higher than top notch. In terms of faculty, excellent. In terms of facilities--Columbia really needs to work on these. Wi-fi, bathrooms, food quality, bureaucracy, practice rooms: they really can become a huge drag and a mess of bureaucratic affairs. But maybe that's just because of the hugeness of the school. I'm willing to handle these inconveniences as long as Columbia keeps its other stuff at the level it's at.

New York? It's a great city to transform in. I really like the city--no problems here.

So Columbia? I enjoy it a lot overall. The experiences I've gone through, such as late night ramen parties, are things I wouldn't trade for the world.

Let's just say that I'm in transition right now--it's difficult, but I'll persevere.